ratti pillo loves you always.

**^&%^$ i can't wait for my vacation.

today i did something stupid at work and i'm still kicking myself about it. i basically let some choice words slip out of my mouth in front of kids, and yeah. i apologized like crazy because I don't want to be one of those people who are disgruntled and awful; the same people I don't like. So, i stepped out of line, and fortunately, the woman who complained was a beautiful, agreeable person, who understood that I was having a bad day.

I feel like I'm always having bad days. I'm not really happy with my life right now; aside from Nick, my friends, when I get to see them. I'm not motivated to do anything as of late. I drove through new brunswick last night after my cousin's birthday and really didn't want to be there. I feel so far away from that life; college and whatnot, but so faraway from anything remotely "adult". I don't know what's going on. All I know is that I'm ready to get out of NJ for a little bit, perhaps collect my thoughts, figure out what's going on, cuddle in the cold weather, and eat lobster. I checked the forecast for Portland and the good news is, no snow! yay!

Not everything has gone to waste though. I started working out a couple of days ago, and already I feel tons better.